That’ll Do Me


The best thing about my job is reading the paper, pinpointing one moron that has surfaced in the week prior and using six hundred of my award-winning words to systematically dismantle the character of that being.

Just to clarify, someone buying me a beer because they thought my writing was ‘sub-par’ qualifies it as award-winning.

Unfortunately this week I was viciously slapped in the face more times than Tony Abbott at a Curves Fitness Centre as I scrolled through the various sporting headlines and as a result, multiple people across multiple disciplines are going to have to wear it.

I’m pretty confident Semi Radradra isn’t the great bloke everyone seems to think he is.

Sure, that’s pretty bloody easy to say now the bloke has flown the coop on his club but if need be, reference my article when I potted him and the Australian team for his selection in the Anzac Test. What kind of bloke denounces his actual country of origin to take part in a rivalry that has no bearing on them whatsoever? The writing was on the wall.

Don’t get me wrong, there isn’t a bigger fault-finder of the Parramatta Eels than me. Salary cap cheating, a terrible club culture and the way they treated Nathan Peats a couple of months ago as only a few examples, I’d sooner castrate myself with a hammer than pull on the blue and gold.

Parramatta made Semi Radradra. They introduced him to Australia, the NRL and the incredible lifestyle of a professional sportsman and therefore should be applauded for their efforts.

Regardless of the underlying reason he doesn’t want to return to Parramatta, Radradra owes the club, his team mates and the contract he signed confirming his services until the end of the 2017 season.

Is Semi doesn’t come back to Australia and the NRL and subsequently takes up an offer to play French Rugby, I bet nothing comes of any further career progression and his time in the limelight is doneski. I base that on absolutely nothing.

Probing further abroad, the Aussie tennis contingent has kicked into gear at the All England Club. Nick Kyrgios? That’ll do me.

I was going to begin this by saying ‘that whole Olympic circus aside’, but I realised I could be far broader than that.

That whole twenty-one years of existence aside, Kyrgios has returned to the headlines this week not for his impressive four set win over a gutsy Radek Stepanek, but for again giving the umpire a spray for something petty during that fixture.

What’s annoying about this happening yet again is it means the focus has to remain firmly on his attitude, rather than his skill. This also happened in that match:

No one will remember that, despite it being the shot of the tournament thus far. His quality on court is more forgettable than meat at a Sea Shepherd rally and this continually happening tastes far worse than the ‘cruelty-free alternative’.

Bernard Tomic got himself in a bit of hot water this week too, for dropping ‘retard’ into a post-match conference. A thoughtless moment yes, but perhaps a little too big of a deal has been made of it, given the contest. The Liberal Democrats will be having an absolute field day.

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